I think I'm going insane (a.k.a. Where's my Piece of Quiet?)

It seems the more I try and focus, the more scattered I get. I will say it again - MOVING SUCKS. What seemed like a very good idea some time in the beginning of the year, has become the on-going "too many tasks to complete, too little time to succeed" ultimate stress recipe. Now, we like our new neighborhood (what little we've taken the time to see and learn), we like the girls' new school (even after conferences today), the commute to and from work has gotten easier (4 miles from the county line and I get home at night before I fall asleep), but all the "making the house ours" projects that must be done before we completely unpack are making me crazy.
Today I spent the day painting the third garage stall. I still haven't had a chance to get groceries for Thanksgiving, but I managed to put the second coat of paint on the walls and ceiling. Thank God for friends with portable heaters. It was about 30 degrees outside, but I had 65-70 degrees inside and loud music to make the task a bit easier. Hope none of our new neighbors were wandering around outside.
Even with that painting project completed, my "to do" list is still as long as my arm.
Hubby wants me to send out Christmas cards yesterday - I may have mentioned that before - but our Christmas card list is stuck in our desktop computer, which is still not completely unpacked and definately not useable. Yippee.
The kids are out of school this week. We haven't managed to do anything exciting, but they don't seem too concerned. They set up the teepee in the living room today and kept themselves entertained while I painted. No blood, nothing broken, it's all good. Hopefully we'll find something fun to do this week. Not sure yet what that will look like - I've got boot camp, siding and window contractors, and work to keep us occupied all week.
A bit scattered tonight - a cookie for you if you actually made it through this drivel. :)

Just a small correction

I only have a quick minute, but I wanted to get this out there, just in case there is someone who really wants to know how to create brain melting effort with minimal equipment. The killer exercise protocol is called a "tabata." Here's one article I found: Four Minute of Pain to Gain
We did a few more today - I won't say I liked them, but they are getting a little bit easier.

What's good for me?

I was considering titling this "Feeling Hedonistic" because I've done quite a few nice things for myself this week, but I'm in such pain today I feel anything but hedonistic! :)

Back to the nice things: Monday after Boot Camp I went to a local beauty school and indulged in a facial and a back facial. One of my new neighbors is a student and gave me her card. It had been a LONG time since my last facial! I had forgotten how nice it felt to lay quietly and let someone pamper me. I think I actually relaxed so much I snored for a minute. Ooops! The back facial was nice, but not having any skin issues that needed tending on my back, it wound up being more like a very cleansing massage. In any case, it felt lovely. I was so relaxed I either fell asleep or entered some alternate consciousness.

Monday night hubby and I actually went on a date. We celebrated our 13th anniversary at The Melting Pot in Minneapolis. Fondue for two was very nice. The dinner took a lot longer than either of us had anticipated, but it was fun. I think we're going to invest in a fondue pot. Not sure if we can trust the girls to cook with pointy sticks....

Tuesday I saw my new chiropractor and had my shoulders worked on. Not exactly comfortable (active release on my supraspinatus muscle is PAINFUL!!!!) but necessary for my health. I also got my hair cut again. I'm really liking this short and sassy look. Takes no time at all to "style" and doesn't get messed up when I wear a winter hat. (Very important consideration this time of year.)

Wednesday was Boot Camp. Holy heck, was it Boot Camp! Our fearless leader had us do something that sounded like Ciabattas - nothing like the flat seasoned bread. These were intense exercise sets - 4 minute sets - 20 seconds of high intensity activity, 10 seconds of rest, 20 seconds high intensity, 10 rest - etc. to 4 minutes. Then a different type of exercise. Then the next 4 minute set. Somewhere in the middle I lost track of everything we did, but it started with rapid fire squats for a set, military crawl on elbows and toes across the gym and back, rapid fire pushups, military crawl, rapid military presses with a weighted bar, military crawl, then my brain melted and ran out of my ears. I vaguely remember doing high knees, mountain climbers, and bicycles; but it's mostly a haze of sweat, grunting, and "oh my God, no way I can continue!" I should have had a clue when our fearless leader told me that she was feeling sick from working out with the early class. I should have suddenly remembered that I had to wash my hair and run away. No such inspiration. I think I oozed out of the gym, because I'm sure I didn't have an iota of strength left at the end of class.

Today I am IN PAIN. Sitting hurts, standing hurts, stairs hurt. I tell myself it's a good pain, proves that I did something good for myself, but I'm having a hard time convincing myself. Someday I'll look back on this and smile, right?

Anyway, started the week being super nice to myself, finished it out by beating the heck out of my body. Well rounded week!

Awesome, thought provoking song

"Slow Fade" by Casting Crowns

Be careful little eyes what you see
It's the second glance that ties your hands as darkness pulls the strings
Be careful little feet where you go
For it's the little feet behind you that are sure to follow

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day
It's a slow fade, it's a slow fade

Be careful little ears what you hear
When flattery leads to compromise, the end is always near
Be careful little lips what you say
For empty words and promises lead broken hearts astray

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away
People never crumble in a day

The journey from your mind to your hands
Is shorter than you're thinking
Be careful if you think you stand
You just might be sinking

It's a slow fade when you give yourself away
It's a slow fade when black and white have turned to gray
Thoughts invade, choices are made, a price will be paid
When you give yourself away

People never crumble in a day
Daddies never crumble in a day
Families never crumble in a day

Oh be careful little eyes what you see
Oh be careful little eyes what you see
For the Father up above is looking down in love
Oh be careful little eyes what you see

The video Slow Fade shows this as about infidelity and the breakup of a marriage. I think the lyrics here cover all kinds of bases. To me, it's all about tolerance. I never really understood my mom's stand on romance novels and horror movies when I was young. She always talked about how you should feed your spirit and that filling one's mind with questionable food would be poisonous to the spirit. The older I get, the more I understand where she was coming from. I work hard to protect my girls from seeing and hearing things that are poisonous to their young minds. The way I see it, it is a "slow fade" when you allow things to be okay that really shouldn't be. Small steps can lead to big problems. Whether it be what I eat, or how I speak, lettings things slide or thinking "it's just a little" has sent me places where I'd rather not be. I'm struggling with my weight again. My speech is a lot "saltier" than I would prefer. My girls probably know more about the bad things in life than they should at their ages.
I think it's time to work on focusing on the good and the positive - instead of a slow fade, I'd like to see a slow gain in my life.

A little heavier than I thought I'd be tonight, but I wanted to share.

Frustrated...

Who pulls an ab muscle? What the hell can you do about a pulled ab muscle?
Whoever comes up with a way to make this thing heal quickly will be treated to mass quantities of liquid refreshment. (Most likely water - it's all I have on hand.)

Anyway, had a lousy morning. Dh and I weren't getting along, more stupid house shit. Kids were fighting. One had a crying jag because I dared insist that she wear a coat - it was snowing! I was angry and hopped up when we got into the car, I backed into the recycling bin, and spread recyclables across the street. I said a few unsavory words at that action. (Junie B anyone?) Called dh and told him that I would quit next time I had a morning like this. Of course, the response I wanted to hear was "I'm sorry you had a lousy morning." That's not quite how the convo went.

SO, I headed into my boot camp fitness class; hoping to run, lift, twist, bend, and sweat out some emotion. Last week, with an errant sneeze, I pulled an ab muscle. A little bit of caution and rest, and I thought it was healed. Slung sheetrock through the weekend, mowed lawn, moved boxes - all normal activities, so I thought I was all good. Even Wednesday's class had gone without a twinge. BUT today, when I really needed to pound myself into a puddle, the damn thing went crazy - I swear I felt it pop on my first box jump, but the pain didn't hit until the tenth one. It was all downhill after that. I couldn't manage any of the ab stations. I wound up crying on the gym floor from frustration. (Not that I didn't manage a good sweaty workout, just not the one I really wanted.) So much for Superwoman.

Oh well, I'm scheduled to give blood in the morning - I may not be able to leap tall buildings, but I can help save a couple of lives, right?

And I'm still frustrated.

What was I thinking???

Yep - started a blog in January. Haven't written since. Darling Hubby saw the blog start, made some kind of unsupportive (as interpreted by me) comment, and I didn't blog again. Heck, I have a hard enough time returning emails from my best friends - when would I have time to write about my uneventful life? So anyway, here I am again - maybe I can be a bit more timely.

I just came back to work after a week off. It was a wonderful week, made me want to retire. UNfortunately, I still have at least 15.25 more years before I can consider hanging up my vest and moving to my mountainside. A girl can dream, right? Of course, daylight savings time ended during my break, so it gets dark almost as soon as I get into the squad and head out - makes for a very long night.